On February 20, 2016, a girl named Nisha Prasai, inboxed in Kmag page.
Fans trying to know the person behind the page was not new to me, and like to every other fan, I was being nice and generous to her. There was something new to her approach though. She wanted to know my full name. Reason I learned later that she wanted to make sure I belong to the caste that she would not have problem marrying to.
I mean who would take such long a shot with a stranger!!
She told me that she had waited all day for me to get back to her.
See? She was behind my last name.
She replied back saying, “there is no one name called Lakshya S.” She actually searched me on Facebook and since my Facebook name was different, she could not find me.
Finally, she somehow found me, not my profile though but a facebook page on my personal name, that I had once created for a while.
And she said something, I said something. We never really could forget the name ever, because we were destined to meet each other in person.
This crazy fan of Kmag, who even without meeting me had thought of marrying me, making sure I match her caste, I didn’t know what to say to this thing happening in my life at that point in time, when my life was in a mess, in a transition phase. That was on February. Until this point, she was just a fan and I didn’t think anything but to respect her innocence and dedication towards my page and my work. Meanwhile, I had created a Facebook group, bringing together Kmag’s true fans and followers, and I invited her to join the group. We stayed in touch here and there through Facebook chat, but nothing as such intention from my side, because I was not in a mood or desire to be in any relationship, that too with a fan. She, however, was quite serious about me, and used to call me her crush. I was hoping that this infatuation of her would fade away with time.
July 2016, I visited Nepal (I was in India till then). There was a gathering of the group I had formed. I tried skipping that gathering because she was coming. I didn’t want to appear and complicate anything between us, because as i said I had no desire to play with a feeling of a fan, who seemingly infatuating. First gathering, I managed to skip but in second gathering, I accidentally stumbled up on and there she was.
Damn! I didn’t want to meet her, but then “now here I am…be nice to her.”
I left from there with casual conversation with the group members including her. I thought after seeing me in my messed up attire, she would change her mind. But then, she still showed no less interest in me, and I gave up. I called her to meet me in person next day on July 24, 2016. That was our first date, which we would celebrate as our anniversary hence.
Until that point, I had not formalized the relationship as such because I was still skeptical about her approach towards me. I warned her though that being in a relationship with me can be very risky given my social media networks, which might expose her as well, and in case relationship didn’t work, she had to live with scars, facing the world with my name tagged. Moreover, I had been thinking that it’s all infatuation and after sometimes, everything will be over.
But she was so sure that it was not an infatuation but a love. I left for India again, asking for sometime for myself to think and prepare.
Meanwhile, we would stay in touch through chats. She would send me meaningful memes and posts and this one hit me hard. “I want us to be like this,” she said.
“Oh, girl how could you be this mad about me?” She is damn pretty, damn sweet and she could have any guy in this world and not me, but still she was wanting me.
I came back to Nepal again as my parents were leaving for Norway to visit my sister. I strictly told her, “See, if you want to be in relationship with me, it must be a serious one, which means you would be introduced to my parents as my future wife; you would be introduced to my friends and circle. Whatever ups and downs, you would not leave me and vice versa. You gotta tell your mom as well about it. I don’t like the typical Nepalese youth love where they should fear and hide from the society and world. It will be like Westerner’s relationship, that they roam around, go around, tell around without hesitation.” I also warned her, “break up with me can be very costly with that level of exposure in this small town so if you need time to think…take your time. Even if you say no to serious relationship, you will not lose me. I will be still there for you to talk, to listen, to help you in need.”
She still said yes to my proposal for serious relationship. That’s how the journey begun towards unknown.
Fast forward three and half years, I am married to her on January 18, 2020, without any family drama, complication, or cold feet, as if everything was meant to be.
She made me believe in three things which I thought would exist only in movie.
- Soul mate.
- Unconditional love.
- Couples are made in heaven.
Some love stories are romantic. Some love stories are inspiring. I am lucky that I got both. I am not bragging about her because she is my wife, but truly speaking, she is the kind of girl I wish for every guy. She is an epitome of Goddesses. I sometime tell her, “You are an angel.” I now feel that more real.
I had been waiting to tell this for a long time but before all that, I wanted to be sure and the marriage ensured everything. Congratulations to us.
Stories and Accomplishments of 2019
These comments are collected from our Facebook Page, Kaagmandu Magazine
On 31st December 2019, we asked our K-mag followers about their achievements and stories that shaped their 2019. Here’s what they have to say.
Roz Khadka: “Sent some creepy people to police station. Not kidding ! “
Suzu Acharya: “I did scuba diving despite of having Aquaphobia.“
Pratima Bista: “Got engaged to love of my life. Happily engaged.“
Sharmila Pun: “2019 was a hella experience for me done and dusted with Rara Lake, Shey Pkhoksundo, Gosaikunda, ABC and at the end of the year lived a couple of days with Chepang Community in Makwanpur. Some done solo, some with my friends/family.“
Shraddha S Adhikari: “Did paragliding, zip flying, visited almost 20 districts of Nepal and succeeded living on my own terms and conditions.“
Amit Gautam:“Added prefix CA to my name.“
Sunil Dhital: “Got a puppy. Simba ya’ll.”
Affy Affy: “Read 60 books ! For 2020, its 100.”
Sagun Pant: “Got married!! To a very great person, beyond my imagination. I had honestly never thought that married life can be this supportive for a female. And eventually fell in love with him. Yes, it was arranged one.“
Bipul Bhattarai: “Dream Accomplished. Successfully worked as a Cricket Commentator.“
Rohan Shrestha: “2019 treated me well with my baby girl.. a proud dad. Well it’s a great feeling to photograph own child.“
Casperskynn Youknowho: “Survived, escaped life threatening diseases and accidents, learned self control and avoided murdering other annoying people. So, i guess not a bad year after going through all the shithouse life had to offer.”
Grishma Ghale: “Graduated, Went Rafting Twice, Almost Died from Cliff Jumping … kinda fun year.”
Scott MacLennan: “Got www.radiomankhu.com on the air and on the internet too.“
Saroj Khadka:“Got Married to my love Sadikshya Karki.“
Asmita Sharma:“Completed first trek in Nepal at Poonhill with beautiful people.”
Rajes Khadka :“Quit my job..Did Dubai Skydiving..Bike ride to Rara Lake..ABC Trek solo and Quality time with Mom.”
Madridista Dhruba:“Had my first solo trek… Which I was wishing for so long.“
Sabin Dawadi: “Rediscovered myself, still in process of rejuvenation though, after 4 years long lackluster period.“
Sharma Rishab: “Did magic mushrooms.“
Prakash Budha: “ Managed to grow apple in my own garden.”
Muskan Pudasainee: “Did a Rolwaling Valley trek“
Nishant Timalsina: “Went to Rara.”
Shreejana Bhattarai: “Did canyoning… hoping to cut off more from the list coming year… for sure 2020 gonna be the wonderful year for me… oh yes, i forgot to mention i donated my hair to cancer patients as well.”
Suman Pandit: “Break up with favorite person who always motivate me, change my life because i am not good for her.”
Niru Shrestha:“Bangkok tour with my 14 year old daughter… that was her first trip in her life.”
“Made it to Everest base camp” –Sanjita Chuchudj Shrestha
“Got a Manager position at age of 22” –Bijay Brown
“Had my first Baby.” –Kiran Bhandari
“We initiated Trek & Treat Campaign starting with RARA-Khaptad trekking route where we carried out eye health camps to remote village of Khatyad, Mugu. Motivated with our first campaign we are now going for our second Trek & Treat Campaign at Jumla on April 2020.”
Aww! I almost felt like crying. Thank you all beautiful souls for making this year memorable for us as well through those words and pics. Wishing you an amazing year ahead.
My secret wish
Christmas is here and the celebrations are up and going.
Let’s make this festival mood more meaningful by expressing your heart out on wishes you would make if you were to meet Santa or the almighty God itself.
We all have our own insecurities, dreams and wishes, problems and challenges, and this kind of game will be a good excuse to lighten up self, and at the same time, let others know.
And hey! we are thinking of sharing the responses. So, it’s definitely gonna be fun.
It’s an anonymous form, so feel free to be as true as you could.
Love you in advance, Strangers!
What did you learn from previous relationships?
As humans, we are naturally built to crave connection. We want to love and be loved. No wonder, relationships occupy a major part in our lives. But “Happily Ever Afters” do take a lot of time, dedication and effort. Not every one of us are blessed enough to marry our first love. We go through lessons after lessons until we find the right one. But most of them are painful. Can’t we skip them?
Below are the few similar lessons from Quora that people shared from their own personal experiences. I hope these lessons save you from years of heartaches.
You learn self-love.
It is a well known fact that you can only pour out what you have. If you lack love yourself, how are you supposed to give it to another person? Self love is a basic foundation in any relationship. When you respect and value yourself, you can give the same to your partner. Lack of self love leads to low self esteem, which will slowly eat away your relationship.
Andrew Ferebee wrote,
“In several relationships, I would begin prioritizing my partner so heavily that I would stop taking care of myself. Look, you won’t be able to be the man or woman they need if you aren’t taking care of yourself. Eat well, get plenty of sleep, go to the gym, prioritize alone time and realize that all of these activities will make you a better partner… Not a selfish partner.” He continues- “Simply put, without self-love, there can be no love for others. You’ll constantly be using others to gain validation and approval instead of giving yourself validation and approval and then inviting others on the journey with you.”
And honestly, I think this lesson needs to be heard by all.
Communication is the key.
Admit it, no matter how well people claim to know each other, people can’t read minds. And that’s the most important reason why you should always communicate whatever you’re feeling. Silence isn’t always golden, is it? Ankit Verma writes,”Only those relationships work where there is equality, maturity and active vocal communication about the problems, from both sides.” Yes indeed. When you are vocal about your needs and problems, you can sit and fix things like how it should actually be done.
Another thing that you should know is, ” People speak different languages of love“- as Kwasi Baako states. Most of the time, the reason that your relationship isn’t working out is because your language of love doesn’t match with that of your partners. When this happens, s/he may not feel loved despite your best efforts. In such case, the first thing you should do is communicate with each other and solve the misunderstanding.
Keep your dignity- Learn to let Go.
When a relationship ends for the first time, it feels so devastating that you try to hold on – especially when the breakup is coming from the other person. Your mind will play a thousand tricks on you, because it loves the feeling of familiarity. When such a situation arise, know that it’s the time when life is testing you. You clinging to a person who deliberately chose to walk away, is only going to give them an ego boost and nothing more. Don’t give in- trust me, you are only extending your heart break.
Kwasi Baako writes- “NEVER EVER GO BACK TO PEOPLE WHO WALK AWAY FROM YOU — it’s a waste of your time , your energy and the highest form of disrespect to you,”
And yes, that is the truth, no matter how bitter it sounds.
You gotta be independent.
Udita Pal talks about three types of independence that everyone should learn- Financial Independence, Emotional Independence and Social Independence. I don’t even have to explain much because she made it so clear herself.
In her own words-
“There are three kinds of independence I’m talking about.
Financial independence: It doesn’t matter who earns more or less; you need to be at a place where your partner or not you can manage your lifestyle. It would be best if you want a partner, not an ATM.
Emotional Independence: A lot of people go through depression immediately after the breakup, which is normal but you need to understand you are more than someone’s partner and relationship or not -you are still going to exist.
Social Independence: You need to have friends outside the relationship and for sure out of the mutual circle, you need people around you to continually remind you that you have someone other than one person looking out for you. And most importantly, never ignore your parents and close ones for your partner.”
Say yes to healthy boundaries.
Andrew Ferebee says,” You need to know what you will and will not tolerate in a relationship and have the guts to actually enforce that.”
Basically, establish healthy boundaries, communicate them and maintain them. You have to know the difference between healthy and unhealthy compromises in a relationship. When you compromise thinking they would change in the future, you are only sowing unresolved conflicts that will show up one day or the other. If you aren’t happy with your partners’ habit in the beginning, chances are you won’t be happy with it five years down the lane.
In the end,
These are only a few among the hundreds of lessons that people shared on Quora. You can definitely check it if you want to read more. But remember, failed relationships never means that you failed your whole life.
Yes I do understand that it may have been a good relationship. But my darlings, good relationships doesn’t necessarily have to be right ones for you !!!
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